SEEKING THE PRESENT

Today, is the last day of my 65th year.

We humans are strange. We acknowledge our year AFTER that year has been completed. I am now officially recognized as a “senior” member of society and qualified for that huge paycheck from that bottomless pit that claimed so much of my paychecks over the last 50 years. I even have a pretty red-white-and-blue, stock paper card to prove it.

Yea me.

It is a day that has always been a reflective one as well. When I was a kid, I would lie awake most of the night – wondering what my present would be – where it was hidden and how long it would take me to find it. I can’t tell you how sad I was when I became a teenager and mom stopped hiding my presents.

I was also born one day before my parents’ 15th wedding anniversary. I’m not sure why that figures in there, but it always does. Instead of just one day, my birthday stretched over 3 days. If it wasn’t a party for me, there was a party for the couple who gave me a path to enter this earthly plane. Somehow – it seemed to be a completion of some sorts in this befuddled mind of mine.

As I got older, I realized that my mom had trained me to use my “birth” day as a different sort of “birth” day. It became a day – not about “getting” things – but instead – about “seeking” things. Where should I seek? When would I decide? How would I know?

Tonight, as I wrote out my war room prayer card, added some doodles to my journal, and read the sixth chapter of Proverbs, I found “new” Bible verses breathing life into this 66th year of life. It reminded me to praise the One who is always with me. [v1-3]. It reminded me to be thankful for my youth and to honor those lessons. [v 20-22] It reminded me to be humble as it highlighted my weaknesses, faults, and the lessons learned there.[v16-17].

When I moved on to Psalms 30, it breathed a reminder that “weeping may remain for a night, but joy comes in the morning…” I needed that today since it has been one of those weeks of watching and remembering people I know that have crossed between the physical and spiritual planes – a former student – a favorite aunt – a mother that could drive me crazy and love me completely.

Finally, 1 Peter 3, huffed its final goal: “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.” [v15a]

So, as I close my eyes on this last night of my 65th year, I will be thinking of many things. Praying for people I know – people I love – and people that I will meet tomorrow. The course has been set, now all I have to do is try to live up to it. Whomever said life got easier when you get older was nuts. I am still struggling to just figure it out a little bit – but I think I just may stay awake a little longer tonight. Wondering about the present My Father has hidden for me to seek this year and just what I will learn. ‪#‎lovingbirthdays‬ ‪#‎gettingexcited‬‪#‎Godismovingonceagain‬

dec 26 2015

On to new adventures

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